Recovery from
Trauma & Loss
Without question
there is a major crisis when children and families are being divided, unhelped and unhealed.
At Compassion House, we offer children and adults practical programs to give them access to hope, dignity, and emotional healing. We teach people that you can choose your future by how you respond to your past. Bitterness is generally rooted in a sense of powerlessness, so we help people move from this place of indignity and powerlessness to a place where they feel like they have some control over their lives and future.
Our Grief Recovery program is key in this process. It gives people access to crucial life skills that most people didn't receive'practical techniques that reconcile feelings of loss and change.
Compassion House serves a population of people whose lives are filled with life's everyday losses: death of a loved one, divorce, separations, estrangements, financial changes, and health problems.
However, for our children, their grief-losses too often include the loss of biological parents, grandparents, and other relatives. The loss of a familiar home, along with the intangible losses of safety and trust, contribute to a loss of dreams, expectations, and hopes. Their parents and relatives so often suffer what is perhaps the deepest wound they can experience: the loss of their children.
Foster parents, who open their hearts and homes to these children, are too often not equipped with tools to truly help the children in their care. Because over twenty years of research has proven that Grief Recovery skills truly work, we have trained and certified six of our staff members as Grief Recovery Specialists. This represents, by far, the greatest investment of our time and resources into any one program. Why? We are thoroughly convinced that these practical steps help families and children reach emotional completion and wholeness. Participants also acquire a skill set that will enable them to reconcile losses in the future.
' Research has shown that the rate of post-traumatic stress disorder is higher among foster care alumni than it is for war veterans. '
Dr. John Seita,
Professor of Social Work, Michigan State University
'Grievers do not lack courage or willingness. What they lack is helpful information and correct choices.'
- John James, Founder, Grief Recovery Institute
Grief is the word we use for the conflicting emotions caused by a change or end in a familiar pattern of behavior. There are more than 40 events that can create the range of human emotions called grief. Whether the loss was recent or long ago, it may still be limiting one's ability to participate fully in life. Grief Recovery techniques assist in the ultimate journey back to one's heart and ability to embrace life in a positive way.
Myths About Grief:
- Time heals all wounds
- Replace the loss
- Grieve alone
- Be strong for others
- Bury your feelings
- Keep busy
Grief Recovery Seminar
What is the purpose of the Seminar?
To help each participant grieve and complete their relationship to the pain and unfinished business caused by a death, separation due to foster care, divorce, or any other significant emotional loss.
When is it time to do my "grief work"?
This is the most difficult question facing grievers. Part of the problem stems from the biggest single inaccurate idea that we were all socialized to believe: that "time heals all wounds." Time does not heal. Actions can help discover and complete unfinished emotional business. When can I begin to discover and complete all of the things that I wish had ended "different, better or more," and all of the broken "hopes, dreams, and expectations" about the future? The answer is immediately. Waiting to do grief work is potentially dangerous. Most likely you've heard that grievers tend to create larger than life memory pictures in which they either "enshrine or bedevil" the person who died. This phenomenon increases with time, making it more difficult to discover the "truth" within the relationship.
How does Grief Recovery differ from therapy?
Since there are so many different types of therapies, it's difficult to give a singular answer. Grief is the normal and natural reaction to loss; grief is not, of itself, a pathological condition nor a personality disorder. Grief Recovery' is primarily an educational, or re-educational experience, based on the fact that most of us were never taught effective tools for dealing with grief. Most participants find that their subsequent therapy is enhanced by their experience in the workshop. In fact, many therapists refer clients to the seminar.
What are some tipoffs that unresolved grief is the cause of my discomfort?
Unresolved grief tends to take people "out of the moment," that is to cause you to be off in conversations with people who are no longer physically there with you. [This is not limited to death. You are equally likely to be lost in a conversation with a former spouse, still living, who is not physically present]. Assuming that your physical health is okay, unresolved grief tends to drain you of energy. Unresolved grief tends to close our hearts down. Since we're incomplete with a prior loss, we almost automatically "protect" ourselves by not loving again. More accurately, we limit our loving exposure and thereby doom the new relationship to fail. Commonly, grievers will hide their true feelings for fear of being judged. Where isolation is the problem, participation is a major component of the solution. The Seminar is aimed at discovering and completing the unfinished emotional business that fuels the isolation.
What is the difference between Grief Recovery and other loss and grief programs?
Many grief groups provide an environment for people to verbalize the thoughts and feelings they experience following a loss. While there is benefit to that kind of expression, often it is not enough. Generally it will have a short-term benefit and not address the underlying issues of "incomplete emotional" communications that sustain unresolved grief. The Grief Recovery' Seminar addresses the incompleteness so that there is long-term benefit, completing the pain and the unfinished emotions.
The Grief Recovery Seminar
This powerful and dynamic experience is the most productive workshop being offered anywhere on people's reaction to loss. The workshop is the most sensible, accessible and authentic plan available for recovery from loss. For anyone who is grieving, the seminar offers Grief Recovery' tools that work for any kind of serious loss. Seminars include educational and experiential sessions dealing with Concepts of Grief, Concepts of Recovery, How Incomplete Loss Occurs, Grief Recovery' Principles, Identifying Incomplete Losses, and Moving Beyond Loss.
To Enroll
To enroll in one of Compassion House's Grief Recovery Seminars, contact Linda Clark at 706-272-2843 or e-mail us at compassionforfamilies@gmail.com.